Hello world, new life

An awesome tree in Rotterdam

I haven't used this blog for so long. Four years. And it was planned to become what later became another blog of mine thanks to the collaboration of a friend. So, what I am doing here is basically repurposing Logic Diary to be what it is supposed to be. A diary. With a sprinkle of logic, just not as much as I intended before my 20s.

After such proemio (read preamble), I might as well start with some more personal introduction.
Hello cyberspace, my name is not important, I come from where I was born, be 23yo and I currently feel like wasting some of the time I don't have writing a blog in the unclear hope of claryinfing me to myself and having some conversation starters with random people.

I am currently studying for my master in the Netherlands. Philosophy of Science, Technology and Society. Deep stuff, eh? I've always been into deep stuff, it seems. I will tell more about this later for sure.

What I'm gonna write about in this firsty entry is my new accomodation here. I live in a two-storey house on campus with fifteen bedrooms, a kitchen/living room/common area, two WCs and a big bathroom with two showers. Basically I am subrenting the room from a very nice girl that left for 6 months for an Erasmus, so I will have to move somewhere else starting from January.
The first thing I thought when I saw the interior of the house was something along the line of "picturesque". The walls are painted with colorful pop images, the common area and wcs filled with charming nude ladies, and bottle caps everywhere on the floor.

Being the nerdy guy that I am, I kind of felt out of my "natural place", as Aristotle may have put it. Still, after almost a couple of months since I'm here, I don't really notice them anymore. I sound annoyingly boring, do I? I most likely appear to be, can't deny that. I feel like what can be called an "awkward guy". I am quite sure that my flatmates are persuaded of this. They also snucked a little piece of newspaper that said "Het is een bijzondere jongen, en dat is het" (He is a peculiar guy, and that's it). I think I was supposed to hang it on my cupboard, but for some reason I didn't do it. Let's try to delve more into this awkwardness however.

According to the MBTI I should be an INTP. And I feel very much like that. MBTI is a psychological framework that analyzes cognitive functions based on the theory of psychological types developed by Carl Jung. With some funky abstract theorizing, it comes up with 16 different personality types. Of course these are abstract types to which a person may tend more or less. I happen to identify as an INTP, which is basically a type obsessed with theories and abstraction (no wonder I am talking about MBTI then). That's what I am busy doing when you see me distracted, probably. The reason why I am bringing this up is just to allow you to get even more insights about my traits if you are crazy enough to go and read about what an INTP is. If you do, tell me, I'd like to talk about it.

Back to the people. Basically as long as I don't get hooked up in an engaging conversation, I may sound and look pretty dull and stereotyped. It may not look so but I like it when people come up and speak to me. If this works great with my classmates, all wonderfully cute brainies, it's hard to get involved here at home. I am busy doing my great stuff, why should I bother with football and drinking? I don't know, on the one side it feels good, on the other I feel like I should be more sociable.

What is funny is actually that in class many are probably of the idea of me being a full extrovert person, always engaged in deep discussion and very elitist about his acquaintance and friends. It is incredible how different the outward look may be from what is actually going on inside, and how many struggles we are actually fighting. The little introvert mushy thing I have inside just shines so bright when we manage to connect with people (this sounds kind of schizophrenic I guess). I have had in the past this negative feedback that my attitude may actually feel judgemental. And sometimes I feel I am. I hate that part of mine, the part that always cares about its value, and how it is perceived by the others. Poor little unconfident me, just calm down. You just need to find your inner peace and joyfully talk to others. Why I struggle so much with this?

Anyway, I simply want to relax and enjoy some interesting conversation with nice people. Which is what I am grateful that I am getting here, and I truly, deeply hope that it can be the same for them.

Rereading all of this, it is just puzzling how I move from a confident, almost annoyingly arrogant style of writing, to a feeble weeping. Or maybe it's just me, overthinking as usual. Ok, enough for the first post. See you next time!

And my beloved poffertjes